Well if no one ever marries me
And I don't see why they should
Nurse says I'm not pretty
And you know I'm seldom good, seldom goodWell if no one ever marries me
I shan't mind very much
Buy a squirrel in a cage
And a little rabbit-hutchNo one marries me
If no one marries me
No one marries me
If no one marries me
Well if no one marries me
I'll have a cottage near a wood
And a pony all my own
A little lamb quite clean and tameThat I can take to townWhen I'm really getting old
At twenty-eight or nine
I'll buy myself a little orphan-girl
And bring her up as mine
No one marries me
If no one marries me
No one marries me
If no one marries me
If no one marries me
Marries me
Well if no one marries me
Marries me
If no one marries me